Computer hiatus

I'm taking a brief vacation from my computer for a few days....there have been too many days in a row that have been filled with nothing but computer work and photoshopping and I need a bit of a break. So....if you will....just picture me laying on some pristine, white sandy beach in Jamaica with a fluffy drink in my hand while I soak in some sun. (Wouldn't that be wonderful?!) That is where I will be in mind. (In reality, I'll just be spending some much needed time tending to my family!) I'll be back in a few days. Just wanted to let you know why I haven't been bloggin'. Until I get back.....

Flying solo...

Ty is out of town for work this weekend, so I am 'flying solo' as I call it. I'm not sure why having the kids to myself on a weekend feels different from any other day during the week when they are with me by myself, but for whatever reason, it does. I miss him. Sunday mornings are just not the same when Ty isn't here to share it. There isn't anyone to commiserate with me about how dang early Luke wakes up or to roll my eyes at when we hear that dreaded sound of Luke's door opening and his little feet pattering down the hall at dawn. :) That child wakes so, so, SO early! This morning though, Ellie preceded him at 5:45 when she was fussing/playing in her bed. Argh. I have learned that this does NOT mean that she is ready to get up, but instead, she just needs a little nudge to get back to sleep, so I went in and moved her from the corner where she had wiggled herself and handed over the blessed binky. Blessed because it now does the trick! She takes it! Finally! It only took 8 months!

So anyway...Ellie went back to sleep and Luke was staring me in the face a short 15 minutes later. I made him crawl into bed with me "on Daddy's side" and rest awhile longer. He lasted a mere 20 minutes longer before I reluctantly went downstairs to turn on Playhouse Disney for him. Long gone are the days of sleeping past sunrise. ***sigh*** Someday, right Mom? Someday.

I'm not quite sure how we will spend the rest of our day today. Its cloudy and dreary out this morning and Ellie is still sleeping (it's 8:10) so it might just be a good day to lounge in our jammies for awhile. We hardly ever get to do that anymore. A chill day at home, I think. Ty's plane doesn't land until 5:30ish, so we should get to lay eyes on him about 6:30 or 7. We are ALL looking forward to that. Ta-ta for now, my friends.

First bloom

My very first blossom opened today on my 'Diana' rose bush! And while this may not seem like such a big deal to any of you, it is a beautiful thing to me! Luke and I have watched each day as the little bud formed and grew, and today it decided to open up and share its beautiful colors with the world. So...naturally, I had to take its picture! :) My first baby bloom......



If my kids have taught me nothing else....it is to delight in the simple things! Today I am doing just that!

Second post for the day...

Whoot, whoot! Aren't I good? Just kidding. I'm just pretty impressed with myself that I was able to post twice in one day! :) Anyway, from the looks of my last post, it seemed as though I only have one child, so I thought I had better even the picture score and add these sweet pictures of Ellie that I took this morning. I'm going to toot my own horn here one more time and say that I actually snapped these (which are probably my most favorite of her to date) in a mere 10 minutes! She is so completely OPPOSITE of Luke when it comes to having her picture taken. She is incredibly cooperative and scrumptiously adorable. I just LOVE this child!!!! I LOVE them BOTH! If fact, that reminds me....Luke said something today that also will get chalked up as one of my most favorite things he's said to me....ever. But first, let me back up and tell you that quite often, out of the blue, I will ask Luke "Who do you think is Mommy's most favorite boy in the whole wide world?" and he always guesses right when he says proudly "ME!". Then I go on to ask him who he think is my most favorite little girl...then who is my most favorite hubba-hubba (which is Ty, of-course!) and so on. So......at the lunch table today, out of the blue, Luke turns to me and asks "So Mommy...who do you think is my favorite girl?" Thinking that he might just say Ellie or Tess, I casually said "I don't know, bub. Who?" He cocked his head to the side then, smiled widely and pointed his index finger straight at my nose and said "YOU Mom! You're my favorite girl!" Oh how my heart went to mush in that moment!!!! I love my sweet boy! I hope I stay his favorite forever!!! (Or at-least until he gets married!) :)

Okay...back to those pictures I promised. Isn't she the prettiest thing you've ever seen!?!?


Waving hello to her blog fans!

Busy bees

It has been a busy, busy week or two for us! Seems like each and every day is full and I am always astonished when 5pm arrives because the days has rushed by so quickly! What has been keeping us so busy you ask? With me, it has been a sudden burst of photography stuff. Spring has definitely sprung in that arena and I've been doing or booking photo shoot after photo shoot. It is good, but very scary for me at the same time. I'm definitely been pushed outside my 'comfort zone' with regards to this little 'business' of mine, which is forcing me to grow and learn a lot in a very short period of time. And change like this is always a little unnerving for me. I like 'stable and predictable' a whole lot more than chaotic and spontaneous...surprise, surprise! :) I'm managing to grow here too. Slowly. The biggest obstacle? To find an acceptable balance between my photography work and my priorities as a wife and mom. (Isn't that all of our dilemas as moms though?! Balancing our roles.) My family and responsibilities to them will ALWAYS come first, so I've been squeezing in time to work on my shoots during short nap times and late at night or in the wee hours before dawn. It makes for some busy (and long!) days for me. I hope I am able to work out a better balance soon!

As for the rest of the family, we've been piling in plenty of 'good stuff' lately too. On Sunday, we spent the vast majority of the day outside, planting vegetables, strawberries and herbs in our little barrels that will be our garden this year. With the new yard put in, we opted to garden in containers rather than leaving lots of open space for veggies in our planter beds. We did plant some lettuce and cucumber under our Alder trees (which are babies themselves!) and those are the only things in the ground though. Luke helped us plant bell peppers, chili peppers, strawberries, broccoli, basil and chives in the pots. Here are a few pics. It was such a beautiful day on Sunday too...perfect gardening weather! We laid a blanket out on the grass with some toys for Ellie and we ALL enjoyed the great weather! Every day since we planted, Luke has been so excited about watering the little plants and even talks sweetly to them as he does it. "Here ya go, little planty. Have a drink of water....here ya go!". Awwwww...so sweet he is!! Warms my heart!




Another kinda silly thing...over the weekend we finally started a 'measuring wall' for the kids heights. Heidi, you'll appreciate this! When I was a kid, Heidi's mom always kept track of the kids heights on the inside wall of Heidi's brother's closet. Since I was always over at their house with Heidi, I invariably had my height recorded on the wall too, and it was something that I always loved. I've always wanted to continue this little tradition with my own kids and on Saturday, we finally chose a spot and measured the tikes. It was fun! And Luke loved helping Daddy mark the wall to see how tall he was! Ours isn't in the closet though..its in the laundry room! :) I am excited to have this as our special spot to see how fast they grow, which indeed they do.

Speaking of growing....can you believe that Ellie turned EIGHT months yesterday?! She has been so much fun lately! Her little personality is bursting through more and more each day! She loves her brother so much and will watch him in fascination as he plays nearby. He adores her too and will often be found right up in her face, laughing hysterically to make her smile. My favorite thing is to see them giggling together! But take a toy away from her and you'll have another thing coming! That girl can SCREAM! And she'll definitely tell you when she doesn't want you to do something! She has an opinion now and she's perfectly comfortable sharing it! LOL! Her hair is starting to grow (yay!) and she is cutting her third tooth this week too ...she is looking less and less like a 'baby' these days. She babbles at me constantly, working out those consonants and of-course my favorite is "ma-ma-ma-ma." :) She is proficiently signing "All done" now too and lights up when she realizes that I know what she is trying to say! Everyone is asking if she is crawling yet....and my answer is always "oh please...not yet!" She gets herself from a seated position to her tummy pretty easily and scoots like an inchworm on her tummy to get a toy, but she can't go far yet. I've seen her attempting to get onto her knees a couple of times, but still to no avail. I know crawling isn't far off though!

And the last big news (big for us!) happened on Monday morning when Luke woke up from sleep DRY for the first time! He's been potty trained (days and naps) since well before Ellie was born, but never at night. We've never pushed that part with him, as we know nighttime dryness is tough! But I purchased a special Cars toy several months ago as an 'incentive' for him. He knew I kept it up on the shelf in the office, and for a long time, he didn't ask about it. But lately, he would wake in the morning and tell me that he stayed dry and ask if he would have it. He was always wet though, and I would tell him the same thing each time he would ask..."when you stay dry ALL night long, then you can have the special car toy." He began assuring me before bedtimes that he was gonna stay dry "I'm gonna stay dry, Momma and get that car thing that goes round and round!" And voila! On Monday morning, wouldn't ya know that he DID IT! I was so, so, so proud of him! He hasn't done it again since, but at-least I know he can do it! Here is a quick (and not so great) picture of him getting his surprise....he was THRILLED!


These last two pictures are from a little trip we took up to Oak Glen last week in preparation for a photo shoot...had to scope out a prospective site (thank, Sarah, for the tip!) I just thought this shot of him completely cracking up was precious...

...I wish I had more time to 'photoshop' it the way I want to. Maybe later.
...and then, being all boy...he just HAD to have a stick!


I know I'm missing some pictures of Ellie. I haven't forgotten her. I just don't have a good recent ones of her. I'll snap some 8 month pics today and try to post one or two soon. For now though, I hear her stirring from sleep, so it's time for me to get going. More to come....

Cloud 9

...that is where I have was this afternoon after lunch at my favorite sandwhich shop followed by an hour massage full body massage, body buffing, and a facial while sitting in a hydrotherapy tub! :) Ahhhhhhh.....sweet relief!!!! Some time ago, much to my surprise, I received the coolest thing in the mail from my sweet friends Heidi and Justin...it was a gift certificate to International Skin and Body Care...a local day spa. I had been privileged to photograph Heidi and Justin a number of times, and as a thank you, they surprised me with this lovely gift certificate! How cool is that?! And today....some 4 and a half months later, I was able to use it! :)



Krystal was able to join me for our Cloud 9 day too, since Will had promised her some much deserved pampering following her 14 days of solo-parenting while he was on his missions trip to Costa Rica. So...with kid-free hands to hold our iced teas, we soaked our feet before our treatments and chatted about nothing important. Then it was off to our individual rooms for some awesome pampering. And I cannot tell you had delicious it all was!! And how MUCH I have looked forward to this day! It is the first time I have been without Ellie for more than 2 hours since her birth! Not that I don't love and adore my children, but some me-only time has been long overdue! Rejuvination....quiet....luxury. Oh, thank you, THANK YOU, Heidi for this priceless gift of a day!

Preparing for preschool...

I registered Luke for preschool today. Can it really be that my firstborn is getting ready to start preschool??? My how quickly time passes! He won't actually begin until late August, since his soon-to-be school follows the traditional Redlands schoool district schedule. The cool part? He will actually be attending the very same preschool that I went to as a little girl. Redlands Playschool. I am SOOOOO excited about this! I adored preschool. I have quite a few fond memories from my time there so many years ago! And I even still have a couple of friends that I made all those 28 years ago...Heidi being the one you all know best. I wonder if Luke will make life long friends there as well? One just never knows! By the way...getting into a good preschool 'round here is like trying to get into college!! (Okay...well...maybe not that bad!) Moms have been known to stand in line at midnight the night before registration to ensure that their kiddo gets into the school they want. Isn't that just crazy?! When I went to tour our school, the director told me this, and I was floored! There was simply no way that I would be able to do that! But since I was an 'alumni', she told me that I would be allowed to come in for pre-registration today. Yay! And once I was there this morning, she actually told the few of us there that we were filling up the few spots that were open and there probably wouldn't be any spots left to be filled on the regular registration day! Phew! How thankful I am to have been able to sign up today!! This school offers everything that I want for Luke. Its perfectly in line with all that I feel is important! A play-focused, Christian school with small classes and a very loving, comfortable, friendly environment. I'm just so glad that he will be able to go there! It is still up in the air as to what his schedule will be like. My first choice was for him to attend Tues/Thurs mornings (9 to noon) and my second choice was M/W/F mornings. We'll find out soon which one we got.

As I was driving to registration this morning, I saw something that made me so sad though. Since we moved here, one of our most favorite things to do has been to admire the beautiful, grassy pasture of horses that sits alongside the highway near our freeway exit. Nearly every single day, those horses have been part of our daily routine. We always admired them as we drove past and Luke and I would look forward to seeing if they were eating or playing as we headed to and from our errands. "What are the horses doing today?" we'd always ask one another. We would often take a quick detour on our way home to sit on the side of the road near the fence line to gaze as those majestic creatures...especially the mare and her foal that was born last spring. Several times, I held Luke up on the wood fencing to pet them, and they would nuzzle up to Luke as if they had always known him. Those horses were always a breathtaking scene for me and daily I would praise God for His beautiful creation as I watched them. Several times, I considered leaving a little note somewhere for the owners, just to let them know how much we enjoyed watching their horses, but I never did. :( Lately though, we had noticed that the horses were corralled in one small area and then one day, part of the fence line was down. And this morning, as I drove down the highway, bulldozers were tearing down their corrals and the horses were gone. I nearly cried. I am so sad to see this bright spot in our day taken away. I wouldn't be surprised to see homes there in time. :( So sad....so very sad.

But of-course, there are other bright spots in my day. And Ellie is one of the cutest!!! :) She seems to be changing so much lately and growing WAY too fast! I think that she signed her first word yesterday. I've been signing several, simple words for her at meal time....more, eat, all done...etc. And yesterday as we were finishing lunch, she flung her arms up near her head and kind of thrashed them around. At first, I thought it was just a fluke and ignored her, but when I tried to offer her another bite, she clamped her mouth shut and threw her arms up again. I asked her then if she was 'all done' and did the sign as I spoke, and sure enough...she threw her arms up and smiled a gigantic smile for me. Awww! I love that she's starting to understand! And she is certainly good at communicating her wishes too! Several times lately, she has flat out refused the food I am offering her (even when it's something she likes) if she sees us eating something she wants. She will make this horrid screeching sound until we offer her a bite (as long as its something she can have) and then she will smile broadly and accept the other food. Silly girl! But I certainly cannot complain! She is a GREAT eater!!!

I have a ton of other little stories to share, but seeing that its getting late for me, I should better let you all get back to your own lives. :) I'll share more later. But as always, thanks for checking in on us! I always love knowing that you are out there reading. And its nice to know that what oftentimes seems mundane to me is actually interesting to you guys! Have a great night, my friends!

Safari animals

For Easter, Luke received several cards in the mail from relatives...most of which had a little cash in them as a special treat. While we socked away most of it in his savings account, we decided to let him pick out something special of his own with the $5 bill Ty's Aunt Vicki and Uncle Tom sent. (Thank you, Vicki!!) It has taken awhile to get out together to find something fun, but on Thursday I needed to stop at Joanne's Craft store for some fabric, so I asked Luke if he'd like to pick something out with his Easter money. Of-course he was super excited!!! This was his first time buying something with his own money and it was a BIG deal! We wandered just about every isle of the craft store, looking at all sorts of different items. He did an awesome job at listening and carefully examining the items on the shelves without pulling everything down or making a mess! I was so proud of him and quite surprised, actually! I usually don't allow him to walk around in stores like that...he usually rides in the cart. I never wanted to provide an opportunity for him to throw a fit because he couldn't have something, or to make a huge mess of the isles. But today was different. He knew he was going to be able to take something home and he was a master at deciding precisely what he wanted. He eyed a small plastic elephant that he would play with in the sand box, a couple of new books, and some art supplies, but decided on a safari animal craft kit and a ladybug shaped, plastic sippy cup in the end. He was so proud to hand the cashier his crisp $5 bill and even more proud when she handed him back his very own bag and a receipt to boot! (In some ways, I think he might have been more excited about the receipt than the things he bought! He even bragged to Daddy about the receipt when we called him from the parking lot!)

It was lunchtime when we arrived back home, and per Luke's request, we washed and filled his new, red, ladybug cup with juice to have along with his lunch, and then we set the craft kit on the table to work on over the weekend. This morning was the big day, and once Ellie was down for her morning nap, Ty, Luke and I all sat together at the kitchen table to assemble his safari animals. Here are a few pics....




The finished product (minus the zebra, which needs to be completed tomorrow)


Cute, eh? Fun times! And good memories of Luke's first shopping trip! :)

Ringmaster

Some days I feel like I am the ringmaster of a three-ring circus, juggling eat and sleep schedules...preparing play times, taming tantrums and flipping circles in order to keep up with it all. Today was one of those days. Now don't get me wrong...it was a good day. Everything was 'managed' smoothly...the kids slept when they should have slept, ate when they were hungry, played well. It was just so crazily busy!

And there I was, prepared for my day (or so I thought) when the alarm sounded at promptly 5:40 this morning. My neighbor was arriving at 9:30 for her maternity photo shoot, and there were plenty of things to get done before her arrival. I downed a half-warm cup of coffee while I peeked quickly at the weather report for the day (a sunny day is pretty important for my photo shoots!) and then scurried upstairs in the dark for a quick shower. The clock read 6:10 as I left the warm haven of the shower behind and I thought to myself "Hey....10 after six...plenty of time to get myself ready before Luke gets up." Oh how wrong I was. His little pj-clad body was at my bedroom door just 4 short minutes later. :( This did not make me very happy, and I was not so chipper in greeting him as I do every other morning. "But its getting light, Mom." he said. Yeah....I guess he was right. Why does it have to get light so dang early these days, anyway??????

Thus our day began. By 7:15, I was makeup'd, clothed, both kids were up, dressed and on our way to being fed. Beds were made, clothes were put away, and after a quick meal, I plopped Ellie down to play while Luke followed me around with his vacuum, and I cleaned up the house a bit. Then it was a quick walking for the dog to pee, three phone calls in a row, a couple of diaper changes (yes...a couple...Ellie is a pooping machine these days!!) and about 20 minutes left to set up for my shoot. Once everything was ready to go, I hustled Ellie back upstairs for her morning nap, timed just perfectly so that she would **hopefully** sleep during my session, which she did. I set up Toy Story 2 to play for Luke while my neighbors were here and I just have to say that he was AWESOME the ENTIRE two hours she was here!! I am so proud of my son! He watched his show, played both inside and out, rode his scooter and bike in the backyard and even grabbed his camera to photograph Tabitha right along with me. :) I really couldn't have asked for a more perfectly choreographed morning. Really. Ellie awoke from her nap at 11: 35 just as Tabitha was heading home and I've already told you what an angel Luke was! Once she left, I had just enough time to put my photography things away and attempt to nurse Ellie before my mom and dad arrived to drop of their dog TJ for the weekend. We're dog-sitting.

When TJ arrived, the house turned into more of a zoo than a circus, with two big, wildly excited hounds wrestling and clamoring through my house! And I kissed my somewhat clean floors goodbye for a few days! :)

To wind down for the hectic morning, I snuck away for a quick (and much needed!) pedicure while the kids were napping. It is Friday after all, and Ty was home for the day by 1pm. Phew! How nice it was to have a half hour of pampering! The rest of the afternoon was much like the morning, with a few less 'activities' tossed in. The kids got up from naps...I made a few phone calls about our insurance...Luke wanted to ride his bike around the block...Ellie needed feeding. You know...the normal, life stuff. Ty had had a rough week, so we decided a few drinks and some pizza was in order in lieu of cooking tonight, so we invited our other neighbors to dinner at our favorite pizza joint and we shared a few beers. Ahhhhhhh. A good way to end a hectic day. :) And now, the show is over. Time for bed. Lights out! :)

I'm feeling a little better about this whole nursing thing today. I think I was just beyond tired last night and feeling rather emotional. A restful night's sleep helped. Perspective. First and foremost, after thinking about it in bed last night, and talking to Ty, I have to admit that the end of nursing is more of a choice I'm making. Not that my dwindling supply isn't a real issue...it is, but I think that in many ways, I'm not totally willing to do what it would take to increase my supply. After all I have been through with nursing Luke, I know what I need to do to increase my milk production....or at-least try to. I know that, if I really wanted to ensure that I make it to the 1 year mark with breastfeeding Ellie (my original goal), I can pump after feedings and in the evenings, continue on the Fenugreek that I've been on for awhile now, and make sure that she is receiving full, uninterrupted, regular feedings throughout the day. I know all of this. The problem??? Life. Simply put, my hands are full. It is so difficult for me to even think about adding more into my day with pumping. Not to mention that Ellie is at that super-distractable stage where even getting to her nurse for more than a few minutes at a time is tough. The dog, her brother, the pretty artwork on the wall....ALL of it takes her attention away from eating. And its just not feasible (nor very safe) to leave Luke alone every time I need to nurse while I take Ellie into a quiet, darkened room to feed her like the books guide you to do.

Last night I think I was throwing a bit of a pity party, to be perfectly honest. I was just feeling frustrated that my body wants nursing to be an all or nothing deal. There is not a middle ground for me. Either I nurse exclusively and work very hard at maintaining my supply, or my supply dwindles down to a trickle. I wish I was one of those women who can nurse intermittently for months on end...say with one or two feedings a day. Wouldn't that be nice? But I just don't think my body works that way. :( So.....long story short....the reality is that I'm choosing not to go full steam ahead with all the steps necessary to maintain my supply....which means nursing is on the way out.

And you know what? I think that's okay. We made it almost 8 months. She's healthy....vibrant....growing (how could she not with the amount of solids she's eating!!!). With Luke, come hell or high water, I was nursing as long as I possibly could. He was a preemie after all, and needed every drop of milk he could get to make sure he was healthy. He needed me to bust my butt to keep my supply up, and I did. But Ellie is a different child in nearly all respects. And she's gonna be just fine. Right????

So full circle I go with my feelings in the last 24 hours. Part of the process, I guess. And really...when all is said and done, it won't seem like such a big deal in the end.

The beginning of the end....

So I am sad to say that I think that we are on the road the the end of nursing. :( And before I even get into why, I have to say that I have quite the mix of emotions about this! About 75% of me feels sad, both because I am finding myself again unable to produce sufficient amounts of milk for my sweet child (I'm sure you all remember my plight with breastfeeding Luke....10 months total, 35 straight days of exclusive pumping...having to unteach Luke bottle feeding and having to train him breastfeed after the NICU....8.5 months spent on endless two week cycles of Reglan to increase my supply, which I will tell you is hellish!!! and having to continually supplement with pumped milk because he just wasn't a great nurser! ) and also because Ellie is my last child. I don't really want this part of her infancy to be over! It has already gone by waaaayyyy too fast! Further still, the end of breastfeeding means more money spent on formula for the next 4 1/2 months. She does take a bottle on occasion now (whoohooo!!!) , but will only down about 2-3 ounces at a time. But hey...at-least she's taking it! And granted....she eats plenty of solids now too (like a whole banana and a big bowl of oatmeal/rice cereal in ONE SITTING!) so the amount of formula she will require will be lessened in that respect. But still, formula is dang expensive!!!

Yet on the other hand, I am kind of looking forward to some of the aspects of this new 'no-breast' chapter. A little more personal freedom for me (you mean I can actually leave my child for more than 3 hours at at time????!!!)...the ability feed her much more readily on the go....no more unflattering nursing bras :) .......and of-course finally being able to work on shedding those last lingering pregnancy pounds!! So there are some good things about it. At-least that is what I keep telling myself. And I try to push away those nagging, guilt-ridden thoughts when they bubble up.

For now though, I think that I will continue to nurse at the times when I know I have milk to offer (usually in the early to late morning) and then I will try again before bed, but I know that will most likely only be the beginning of the end and that my supply will likely dwindle after that. But at-least its something....for awhile anyway. And maybe this cutting back phase will give me some time to accept it all and feel better about it. For tonight however, writing about it has actually made me feel a bit more down (usually it helps), so I think I had better get going for now. Sorry for the jumbled, disjointed way in which I'm writing tonight....guess I'm having a harder time quantifying my feelings than I thought! Maybe sleep will help. Off to bed for now. Night.