Strength will rise...

Turn on your speakers...

So....I awoke this morning, after a fitful and not restful night of sleep, feeling overwhelmed, tired, and emotional. From the moment my feet hit the floor and I walked in the darkness to the bathroom to ready myself for my very early (!!) workout, I felt attacked with all sorts of negative thoughts and emotions. It seemed as though the enemy had a sure fire plan to hit me right where and when he knew I was weak. I am weary today and my threshold is low....mostly from the sheer amount of things that need to be accomplished in my day and as I look ahead to the few weeks ahead of me, I see no real reprieve. Not that things are terrible. They most certainly are not! I know I am blessed beyond measure in so many ways! But today, I am just feeling the effects of my lack of sleep (insomnia is a terrible thing!), the lack of time I have had to be with my family, or tend adequately to my home, and the intense amount of time I have been sitting here at this computer screen for several weeks now. Today is just one of those days.

But back to my drive....in my tired, weary state of mind, I tend to succumb to all those negative, guilt-ridden, self-depreciating kinds of thoughts and it is hard for me to break free from that mindset. As I drove the canyon home from dropping Luke off at school, it was almost as if I could feel the weight of those emotions sitting heavy on my shoulders, and I just kept thinking how desperately I wanted to shake it off and not feel so weary! It was then that the song I have playing first on my playlist today (did you turn on your speakers?) came on the radio. Its by Lincoln Brewster and it bolstered my spirits! And ironically, God waited to have me hear this song until He knew my car (and my mind) was quiet. As always, His timing is perfect! Had it been just 10 minutes prior, the song would have been competing with a inquisitive three-year-old who often throws a zillion questions at me as we drive, and I probably would not have truly been listening! : ) In part of the song it says, " You are the everlasting God. You do not faint, You won't grow weary." Oh how awesome it is this morning to be reminded that God does NOT grow weary...that He is the everlasting God who I can turn to for strength and comfort when I feel weak! "You do not faint, You won't grow weary! You're the defender of the weak, You comfort those in need, You lift us up on wings like eagles." Thank you, Lord! I get choked up even know, as I did in the car, reading those words.

And if that wasn't enough to give me courage and bolster my strength, God went and took it one step further with the very next song that played; to let me know that He is here, and He understands. That I am His and I need not listen to the lies of the enemy telling me I am worthless! Here are the lyrics of that song. I just feel compelled today to share them...

I’ve been hearing voices
Telling me that I could
Never be what I wanna be.
They’re binding me with lies,
Haunting me at night,
And saying there’s nothing to believe.
Somewhere in the quietness,
When I’m overcome with loneliness,
I hear You call my name.
And like a father You are near
And as I listen I can hear You say

You are a child of Mine
Born of My own design
And you bear the heart of life.
No matter where you go,
Oh, you will always know
You have been made free in Christ.
You are a child of Mine

And so I listen as You tell me who I am
And who it is I’m gonna be.
And I hang on every word,
Knowing I have heard
I am Yours and I am free
But when I am alone at night
That is when I hear the lie
You’ll never be enough
And though I’m giving into fear
If I listen I can hear You say

You are a child of Mine
Born of My own design
And you bear the heart of life.
No matter where you go,
Oh, you will always know
You have been made free in Christ.
You are a child of Mine

I just have to praise Him this morning, that it is when I am weak, He is strong! I lean on that strength today!